Sammy. Yeah, it's been a while since he's heard that outside of his nightmares. It's incredibly more comforting in this context.
Dean's expression, the tone of his voice, and his way of immediately trying to put on his game face, slip into his "brave and unbreakable" persona when he realizes this is his little brother, all makes perfect sense to Sam. For him, the last time they saw each other, Sam had died in his arms. He can only imagine how awful that must have been for him. Isn't surprised in the slightest that Dean would immediately try to hide, at least in front of Sam, just how awful it had been for him. And he has a million and one questions for his brother, absolutely. Just not the ones that Dean is expecting. The word "Hell" doesn't even enter into the equation.
The questions can come later anyway. Because once Dean makes a motion to move forward, Sam's unexpected paralysis at seeing him finally breaks, and he's rushing forward. He wraps his brother in a hug there on the stairs, not asking for permission or even giving warning of an impending mushy moment or telling him to suck it up and deal with it, Dean, if you make a joke about this I'm pushing you down the stairs. It would be an empty threat anyway, of course, it always is. Lifelong brother threats of 'if you do that one more time, I'm gonna kill you.' But Sam doesn't feel like making one now because it would hit too close to heart. They might both be dead already. And yet that prospect doesn't bother him as much as it should, now that they're both here.
Wondering about Dean constantly had been like a black cloud following him wherever he went. There was not a single thing in this fantasy paradise of a world that he could truly enjoy when he hadn't known for sure what this all meant for Dean, Sam showing up here, having in all likelihood died.
He's aware that Dean has asked him a question, that he's just as confused as Sam had been upon waking up here. Which also makes complete sense, but leaves him wondering just how Dean had died to end up here. If he did die. If that's what this place was about. Truthfully none of the others he had talked to about their last moments before arriving had seemed to indicate that any of them had died.
Suddenly he feels inadequate for not having much in the way of answers for Dean. He's been here a month and he still doesn't know anything about why or how he got here. Or who brought him here. It's terrible hunting work, Dean has a right to be disappointed in him when he finds out. Which will be any moment, because at some point the hugging will have to stop and Sam will have to answer.
no subject
Dean's expression, the tone of his voice, and his way of immediately trying to put on his game face, slip into his "brave and unbreakable" persona when he realizes this is his little brother, all makes perfect sense to Sam. For him, the last time they saw each other, Sam had died in his arms. He can only imagine how awful that must have been for him. Isn't surprised in the slightest that Dean would immediately try to hide, at least in front of Sam, just how awful it had been for him. And he has a million and one questions for his brother, absolutely. Just not the ones that Dean is expecting. The word "Hell" doesn't even enter into the equation.
The questions can come later anyway. Because once Dean makes a motion to move forward, Sam's unexpected paralysis at seeing him finally breaks, and he's rushing forward. He wraps his brother in a hug there on the stairs, not asking for permission or even giving warning of an impending mushy moment or telling him to suck it up and deal with it, Dean, if you make a joke about this I'm pushing you down the stairs. It would be an empty threat anyway, of course, it always is. Lifelong brother threats of 'if you do that one more time, I'm gonna kill you.' But Sam doesn't feel like making one now because it would hit too close to heart. They might both be dead already. And yet that prospect doesn't bother him as much as it should, now that they're both here.
Wondering about Dean constantly had been like a black cloud following him wherever he went. There was not a single thing in this fantasy paradise of a world that he could truly enjoy when he hadn't known for sure what this all meant for Dean, Sam showing up here, having in all likelihood died.
He's aware that Dean has asked him a question, that he's just as confused as Sam had been upon waking up here. Which also makes complete sense, but leaves him wondering just how Dean had died to end up here. If he did die. If that's what this place was about. Truthfully none of the others he had talked to about their last moments before arriving had seemed to indicate that any of them had died.
Suddenly he feels inadequate for not having much in the way of answers for Dean. He's been here a month and he still doesn't know anything about why or how he got here. Or who brought him here. It's terrible hunting work, Dean has a right to be disappointed in him when he finds out. Which will be any moment, because at some point the hugging will have to stop and Sam will have to answer.